WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, THROW THEM BACK. LEMONS ARE A TERRIBLE GIFT.

Life wasn’t giving Jimmy the lemon’s he’d heard so much about, but what it was giving him was a job, a place to stay and money from said job. His new team, Samut Songkhram were expected to be fighting it out at the bottom end of the table with relegation very likely, however Jimmy’s new advocate had other ideas.

Upon meeting the advocate for the first time, Jimmy was told in no uncertain terms ‘I’ll be watching your every move’

‘Weirdo’

‘From what I’ve heard you’re the one that’s weird’

Jimmy reluctantly accepted his new companion, although not everything was doom and gloom. The first day in the job, his advocate confirmed to Jimmy the club would be hiring a director of football to oversee transfers, something Jimmy was grateful for

‘The bosses have got a former player in to help you, his name is Alexey, he’ll be here tomorrow, but he’s already agreed deals for 2 players’

Alexey joined Jimmy and his advocate in the players lounge the following day and introduced himself to Jimmy. Once the pleasantries were out of the way they conducted business

‘I can confirm the bosses have sanctioned 2 new player signings, both from Tuvalu. Midfielder Vaisua Liva and forward Alopua Petoa will be here later today

Not world beaters, I mean who from Tuvalu would ever be any decent? But it was 2 more players at his disposal, and he was grateful for the support.

After meeting his new team and asking a few things, mainly where the best drinking spots in Samut are and briefly going over tactics, Jimmy had a long discussion with his new advocate to clear things up

‘Firstly you probably don’t like me…’

Jimmy cut him off ‘No shit I don’t, you’re a massive bell end!’

‘I can be your best friend or worst enemy James’

‘Don’t call me that’

‘I’ll call you Fred fucking Flintstone if I want, now listen to me’ he allowed himself a moment ‘You find yourself in a unique position, the bosses have friends within the authorities here in Thailand, and have been looking at ways to get into favourable positions in football. The idea is for you to get a bit of a reputation in this part of the world and before long get you into a top club where the bosses can invest heavily and win’

Jimmy looked confused

‘Don’t worry about it, I’ve got things lined up for the short term’

‘How’?

‘You’re going to be here in Samut for this year, then we’ll see. We’ll take things as they come, but we’re in a good position here. We stay up and can build on getting promotion, but let’s take it slow for now’

‘It’s not like I have a choice is it’

‘No, but just trust me okay. I can see that you’re conflicted so let me explain it like this. If, in the unlikely event you fail here or anywhere else, you will have had experience of managing and a good few years on your CV. There’s plenty of clubs around the world that would take you on with a few years under your belt. You could even look at it as starting again in that event, but it won’t happen.’ He waited a moment ‘I’ve got as much at stake as you, if you fail I fail. I’m here to guide you and make sure you get as much of a chance of success as possible. Hell you could even go back to Scotland I hear their leagues are pretty shit at the minute’

‘True that actually’

‘See, so you’re either going to be in a better position professionally and financially than you are now, or you’re going to have gained experience to better your chances elsewhere, it’s a no lose situation’

‘All I remember from my old man before he went for smokes and never came back was that he always said if something seems too good to be true than it usually is’

‘Did he ever come back?’

‘No’

‘Fuck that guy and his stupid comments. You’re a football manager Jim, he’s not. Now enough talk, you’ve got work to do’

On their way out of the room, the old man who had so far accompanied Jimmy on this journey approached and the advocate spoke ‘He’s leaving us for now’

The old man cut him off ‘You’re damn right I am, I’m too old for this shit!’ and he slammed the door on his way out.


Previous chapter – TRAVELLING FOR 1,000 DAYS IS BETTER THAN SITTING IN PRISON FOR 1

First chapter – When Saturday Comes – Part i

One thought on “WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, THROW THEM BACK. LEMONS ARE A TERRIBLE GIFT.

  1. Pingback: TRAVELLING FOR 1,000 DAYS IS BETTER THAN SITTING IN PRISON FOR 1 | On the Break

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